Control or Expansion, you decide

How did controlling another start? A misunderstanding is what seems to be at this root. I came across an example today while talking to a friend and here's what I've found-

The creator and the destructor are a perfect union. Lets say men are destructors and women are creators. A child constructs a tower with blocks. Another child comes and knocks them over. How do we respond as parents? How do we respond as observers? How do we respond to each child involved?

This story is one of expansion. The boy child who knocks down the tower is actually asking for expansion. His nature is to destruct because without destruction we cannot have creation. The boy reaches out to the girls somewhat tall tower and inside his heart says “I want a bigger tower to knock down, I am activating my natural desire for expansion.” The girl can respond in several ways. ”He hurt me, this is personal” In truth this is a projection and belief given to her from her caregivers. “He wants me to build it bigger, he sees me as a creator. I bet if I ask him he will even help or give ideas on the way to make this of most value for us each. This gives us both a way to expand as completely as we can in this moment because it is his desire and now I choose for it to also be my desire or not my desire. (See it is only his desire, not his need or want but he knows he’s here to expand and create expansion. He creates the room for expansion, although without this co-creation he is not expecting to create both the destruction and creation but allowing another to create the expansion and he waits in this child like state of anticipation about what will unfold. He knows his truth and it is in shaming from a caregiver, which he turns the anger inward and it become destructive through personal control and force vs. through desire.

Where the wind blows you is your choice

There is this pull in me to share the unfoldings of my own journey. In order to connect in my full truth I've needed to go deep into the repressions. Then as I free them my body changes, physical ailments I once had, some chronic just dissappear. It appears there is no rhyme or reason to where, why or when things stop hurting. Although there is, this is the background work my journey is sorting out. My body is a road map and I've traveled a way in this body, compensating, controlling and sedating myself so I could continue to survive. At some point enduring becomes too much. I've hit that breaking point several times and it is a wild soul who sits in their darkest moments with a drum beating to give up and camly allows the rest of the parts who are not beating this drum to, in a relaxed state "watch the drumming" and make the choice not to participate.

This is the grounding, the one teether securing us because when we really look at the drumming it is only fear, the drumming of the "Law of Distraction". Which brings me to a point, if you are distracting yourself all of the time, doing, doing, doing. You are banging this drum and one day this drum will speak. I don't say this from a place of fear because really, nothing is scary it is protective beliefs that sheltered us from certain aspects as we grew and they are now no longer needed. So because they aren't needed, it is time to shed them. This is creation. Deconstruction for expansion and recreation. Creation is messy, it can be painful, however, it is worth going through the experiences of the repressions to integrate them because we then live life whole.